Have you ever noticed when the end of things approaches our attitude and effort will often change?
I have an idea that the termination of things is painful for most people. We often don’t think about the end. We don’t want to have to face it and deal with it. We ignore it and push it away.
The simple reality is that there are cycles to pretty much everything. There’s a beginning, then things exist for as long as they do, and then there’s an end. This is normal and natural. Everything ends. We have an obsession with immortality and the idea of forever.
I mention that things are “normal and natural” because I’m really wanting to bring attention to how the world works rather than how we often want them to be that’s out of sync with the world.
Your dog will die.
Hell! Everyone you know will die. Everyone!
Your job will end.
Your partner(s) will die or leave you.
How do you end your job?
How do you close a relationship?
How do you move to another city?
How do you honor the end of someone’s life?
When we struggle with terminations there are all kinds of dysfunctional endings; “ghosting”, blowing up, prolonging, clinging, ignoring, or other forms of inward cavitation or outward ruptures. Consider your go-tos now.
Throughout life most of us have experienced many different kinds of termination trauma. We’ve seen it time after time after time. So we blow shit up. We create or cosign in some drama to distract. It’s not easy to be angry but it’s probably easier to feel angry than it is to feel the depth of our sadness. The depth of our sadness reflects the power of our attachment or even the power of our love.
Love being said to be the scariest thing we can experience. Our tactics to not feel that terror and push it away is worthy of our time and examination. Frankly, I think that’s one of the things that life is all about.
What are some of experiences that have taught you how to terminate things dysfunctionally?
What will it take to face an end with honor and love rather than absence or explosion?
Who have you been unwilling to say goodbye to?
What are you unwilling to face that you know needs to end?
Thanks for your time, have a great day!