Society has some basic rules for life; have a good job, a good family unit, the right hair, car, partner, blah blah blah… From the watch you wear to the purse you carry the markers for belonging are fairly mapped out.
When we don’t comply or fall on the correct side of societies boundaries the pain and discomfort we feel is shame. (We don’t belong, we’ll be rejected, people just won’t want to connect with us.) The problem is that we’re neurobiologically wired to connect. It’s why we’re all here. And the plot thickens…
So what drives you to live the way you do and… does it need to change?
I talk about time a lot. I’m pretty much obsessed with it. It’s so valuable because it can’t be bought and is non renewable. Period. The use and expenditure of time should be examined and updated because of this fact. We all waste time.
The point I’m driving at is for you to look deeply at where/how you spend your energy and time. Are you driven to be perceived a certain way by following the prescribed rules laid out by society that are total bullshit or are you doing what is in alignment with your heart and soul?
Through examination we can more fully understand the rules that are creating tension in our lives. Once we understand those rules we can make a conscious choice of what actually fits and what doesn’t with our higher priorities. The truth is that we often just unconsciously follow along with shame based rules of society.
These rules result in beliefs and behaviors being harbored in us that lodge themselves deep and strong. These things need to be excised purged in order for change to occur. When we can make those changes we feel extremely free.
The opportunity;
What old, worn out, societal rules do you struggle to let go of?
How does following a societal rule get in the way of your deeper passion?
In the past how have you betrayed yourself in order to belong?
What are your go-to unhealthy methods to gain connection?