New Flash! We’re all attached to our suffering at some level. The question is, how attached are you? Everyone I know has experienced challenges-from horrendous childhood traumas to struggles in the form of eustress we all have a relationship with tension and difficulty.
There are even times that people are so attached to their suffering they worship their wounds and bask in the benefits from them. Crazy, I know, but I’ve done it and the truth is I still do sometimes.
At the point I finally started to see and feel a deeper sense of peace and love it felt foreign. Don’t get me wrong it felt good but also bad. It just didn’t feel like it fit well. Like a pair of leather boots or gloves that needed some serious breaking in. Stiff. Awkward. Uncomfortable. I resisted it.
I know of many people who have similar experiences where things are going well but not feeling like it will last. Life is good-we’re in a powerful, beautiful, intimate relationship, work is going smooth, and we’re healthy and seemingly invincible… and that voice starts whispering… “watch out… the pain is gonna come… ”
Some part in all of us knows that with deep love, intense passion, and fulfillment there is certainly going to be deep grief. And this is true. The pain will come for all of us. In the end we will certainly lose our home, our health, our deepest relationships, and we lose our mind.
Some prepare for that traumatic end. We face difficulties now and learn to manage and handle distress. I’ve learned that bad times will come and they will also go. Life is a series of ups and downs. I also know that we have tendencies sabotage ourselves. We look for an emergency exit or side door to get out while the getting is good. We pull the rip cord and abandon ship. Don’t fall too deeply into love or get used to peace because it won’t last. Who’s with me here?
Another facet to all of this is that we expect bad things to happen to us because we struggle to believe we deserve love, peace, passion, admiration, etc etc. I can’t tell you how long I felt unworthy, unloveable, and broken. This caused me to see the people who cared about me as flawed.
Since I can fall into the grips of believing I’m a piece of shit. How could someone love me? And since I don’t deserve a life of peace and ease I figured that I was merely a visitor and that my visa would expire and I’d have to back to where I belong… hell.
You, me, anyone has the power to create what we want to create. If we expect pain and disappointment we’ll find it. I’m certain of this. But if we believe we’re worthy of love, peace, and fulfillment that will show up more and more and more.
The opportunity:
Are you the kind of person that has good things happen to them or bad things? Why do you think that is?
What is likely to happen based on how you’re currently living?
Do you give your friends, family, and loved ones the gift of you being happy?
Thanks for your time, have a great day!