I’m not sure what your idea of a hero is and I know there are plenty of versions. We have the movie superhero. Or maybe the social justice warrior who stands up to oppression. I want to tease apart a couple that I’ve been thinking about lately.

Webster’s definition is this;

“A person who is admired or idealized for courage, outstanding achievements, or noble qualities.”

Some other ideas are this;

“A hero is an ordinary person who survives an extraordinary experience and returns to share important truths about life that they learned, so they can enrich the lives of others.”

There’s a certain type of hero that comes from our ego… my ego. The one that saves the day. They come in clutch and in the perfect moment does that special thing that only they can do. This version gains significance from being the one that conquers the adversary. This version looks for problems. Because we can’t save the day if we don’t have a problem to save people from. I’ve even been known to create the problems… they have special names and diagnoses for that?! Jeez…

It might be time to rethink what being a hero is.

Another place on the hero spectrum is one where “heroism is not the province only of those who perform extraordinary deeds or take impulsive risks to protect themselves or others.” But rather, “Heroism is a mind-set or an accumulation of our personal and social habits. It it a way of being.” Heroism can also be “to commit daily deeds of kindness, to radiate compassion, starting with self compassion; to bring out the best in others and ourselves; to sustain love, even in our most challenging relationships; to celebrate and exercise the power of our own mental freedom.”

A few weeks back I asked the question: Are you giving your loved ones in your life the gift of your happiness? Another, more direct and confrontational question is are the people who you say you love and are important safe from you?

Your low hanging fruit might just be to save your family from your shitty moods or to do that work to create an environment of love and happiness.

I’ve talked about resentment recently. When I live with resentment I’m not creating happiness and love in my relationships. Or if I am it’s going to have limitations. My resentment is just that, it’s mine, and I hold onto it for selfish reasons. Can I/we be the hero that’s selfless? Wow! What an idea.

The opportunity:

Who in your life is not safe from you?

Who benefits from your resentment?

Do you have the courage to deeply love all the people in your life?

Thanks for your time, have a great day!