I’m not doing as good as I’d like to. I think I should be doing better.
Okay, I admit it, I’ve gone down the list to blame anyone and everyone I can think of because it’s certainly not my fault.
How do these sound;
I haven’t had enough time.
My coach isn’t doing what I need him to. (That fucker!)
I haven’t found the right magic pill or snake oil to “fix” everything.
My employees, my boss, my…
I need my intimate partner to…
These are common thoughts with individuals who strive for higher and higher levels of accomplishment and achievement, we all do that. Here’s what I ask myself and I think you should ask yourself too; “What if I took 100% responsibility for the outcome of everything in my life?”
The fact is, I’m doing exactly as I should be considering all the factors that are contributing to me performing and feeling the way I do, and I’m responsible for all of those factors. These are basic laws that govern the universe. I’m no genetically gifted person on the outer edge of the spectrum. I’m not one of those guys that fucks up the curve. Each and every thing I put in alignment enables me get closer to what I want.
Mental fatigue and emotional distress are part of the game when it comes to improvement. I haven’t found anyone yet who’s immune. In a way, I’m glad because it helps me feel like I’m connected to humanity. I know that I’m having a shared experience.
Throughout the week, in my conversations with clients, friends and colleagues I’m striving to find deeper meaning to living, I’m looking for how dynamics and cycles of life are simply gateways to deeper stratus of existence. I need reminders to keep orienting myself around what really, really matters.
I admit that the importance I place on winning at exercising can run along a scale. I’m willing to admit, sometimes it means almost everything (ridiculous) and sometimes it doesn’t mean anything. That slide along the scale can be perplexing but what’s more complicated than being a human. Let’s face it, exercise isn’t what it’s all about.
I continue to see that there are transferable skills in all of this. For me, it’s about holding on for a few seconds longer when my lungs are burning and my brain is screaming that we’re going to die. It’s about standing up one or two or three more times when my legs are wobbly and my knees are shaking. My adherence to the goal amidst adversity is what really does mean something. This is the habit I want to make and a pattern worthy of imprinting.
What do you anchor yourself to when the bargaining starts to happen? What tools have you put in place to assist you when you’re triggered into a bad mental space and you’re terrified? How do you intervene with your natural tendency for comfort?
Here’s a great reframe I just heard yesterday. Feel into the difference between stress and adversity. It’s a little different because stress is like the boogeyman whereas adversity is more like a healthy obstacle that needs a solution. How do you choose to cope with adversity?