As we move towards the end of the year I imagine that, like me, you’re taking inventory or what your 2020 has been like. It’s been a unique and interesting year. I hope that you’ve learned a lot and stretched yourself if ways that’s helping you grow and adapt. We’re hardwired to grow and evolve as humans, the question is, are we shaping that with intention and consciousness to our greatest potential to become more and more aligned with our deepest selves?
As you look back as well as look forward keep in mind that when we tell ourselves and we tell others what we want to accomplish or do that is our word, our commitment. We’re speaking it out to the universe. Are you doing that flippantly or with deep intention? Some ideas are great fantasies but should stay as fantasies while others need and should be developed. Are you developing the the ones you should be?
Integrity is living in alignment with my values. It means that under any circumstance I stay congruent and I speak, act, think, and make choices based on what reflects my deepest values and core principals.
Accountability means when I make an agreement with someone or myself and I don’t keep it I “account” for what happened. I face the truth about it and seek to make better and better agreements that have me be a person who is trusted, believed in, and known as someone who owns where I fuck up. So… a person can be in integrity with themselves but still need to account for an agreement they made.
Agreements are important but depending on the agreement when my priorities are clear I can make a choice to do something in a moment that becomes more important to me than the agreement.
Let’s use the example of the school bus full of kids that gets into an accident. I’m there, I think that I should stop and help so that I can hopefully ensure they’re safe. The bad news is that it will take me some time and I have an appointment to meet a friend for coffee. If I don’t stop I’ll make it on time and there will be no need to account for being late BUT I value helping others and trying to protect children.
Is this a tough choice or is it plain as day what to do? Or do you find yourself late to coffee with people often because you continually find yourself elevating things that you say about important to you? This can be a slippery slope coming from a place that’s guided by good intentions. Hmm…
So as we get closer to the sun setting on 2020 it’s time to account for what you said you’d do. This is a model for you put them through and face the truth about what got in your way.
1. What was the goal and who was involved in it?
2. What choices led to you not pulling off what you said you would?
3. What part of you did you put in charge with carrying the agreement that was the wrong person for the job?
4. What are the consequences for not doing what you said you would?
5. How did your choices and you not making it happen negatively impact others and your relationship with them?
6. Is that the person you want to be?
7. Are you aligned with your principals and values?
We all fuck up our agreements, that’s human but where we can differ is where we choose to examine what causes us to break agreements and word from a place where we’re likely sabotaging our relationships and success.
The opportunity here is to sit down with your 2020 goals and face the music about what you didn’t do and why. Next week let’s look at setting some goals for 2021!
Thanks for your time, have a great day!